I like to play games. I don’t like to play ordinary games. I hate Monopoly, basketball, Marco Polo. I like to play games without rules. Games that I make up.
When I was about 12 I had a fascination with cards. I really wanted to learn how to play card games like Poker, Blackjack, Rummy. No one in my family played cards. They played Jenga, Sorry, Duck Duck Goose. The only thing my mom really knew how to do with cards was shuffle. And could she shuffle. She could do hand over hand filp to the rainbow bridge and bring it back. She taught me how to shuffle. I practiced in the kitchen, bedroom, coffee table until I could flip those cards in the perfect rainbow bridge. It took about a week. I wanted more. Since no one knew any games I started making them up. I tried them on my dad who was usually willing to endure whatever experiment I needed field testing for. The first game was called Queens. I now imagine that it was an incredibly less sophisticated Euchre with bastard elements of War. The basic premise of the game was to get all the Queens. You would lay down other cards in competition with one another until one person had all the Queens. It was a two person game. In order to get all of the Queens, I used my newly acquired shuffling skills, and stacked the deck in my favor. Every other card was one that I wanted. I always won. I started calling the game Winning. My dad wasn’t sold, but he amused me and said it was a good attempt, but that I should probably try again. Luckily for him, I had another game in the works. I explained the rules to him. I threw the cards in the air, we both dove to pick them up and whoever had the most in their hand at the end was declared Winner. He laughed tremendously, rubbing his palms together squinting his eyes closed and leaning forward. “You just invented 52 card pick-up.”
So I wasn’t too good at card games. Even in my adulthood the only game I can stand is Euchre. Anything else bores me. I still like to play games. I like to make them up too. But now the titles are more like “Guess my age” “Criss-cross street running” “Shout Loudly” and “Street Glass Races.” They are pretty simple games, that require the most basic explanations.
“Guess my age” usually takes place at parties involving alcohol. For some reason, a lot of people ask how old I am. I’ve been told that it is hard to “pin me down” for a certain age. I have no idea, but it makes for a fun game. There are two versions of the game: Other-initiate and Self-initiate. In the first version, two guys (usually in line for beer pong or the bathroom) will whisper to each other. One of them leans forward to catch my attention. Then they have the option of “Hey” eye contact or the shoulder swipe. They can first propose an age, which is the active route, or they can simply ask, “My friend and I have a bet and we were wondering how old you are.” This is not my favorite approach, but in my inebriation I agree to play anyway. “Guess” I say. The first guess is almost always 21 (They are hoping). “No” “19?” “No” “18?” “No” “22?” “no” “20?” “yes” Then one usually cheers, they slap hands and turn away. I guess they win in this version. After that, I get excited to play. I am curious to see what other people think. Once I start conversations with some fellas outside or inside or upside down, I pop the question: “How old do you think I am?” There are as many answers as there are stars, but it usually ends in the game. “I don’t know,” They’ll say. “Guess.” I reply, and it starts again, until we reach the number and then they make some sort of explanation about why they thought this and that and pish-posh-mist. I think that I win here.
“Criss- cross Street Running” is pretty self explanatory. It involves two people. We run from curb to curb crossing each other’s paths. Pushing is involved, lots and lots of pushing.
The others speak for themselves, and have not been officially drafted into my games archive, but I play them often.
I played a new game last night called “Try to convince someone to swim, who does not want to swim” This is a coaxing game. I was at a party last night and everyone decided that they wanted to go to some place called “The hair pool,” which instantly made me want to vomit. But I went because the party was kind of dying and I like to go on fun adventures if I’m still conscious. I was talking to someone and ended up convincing them to come. He stated that he probably wouldn’t swim, because he didn’t like to swim. I said I probably wouldn’t either, because I really don’t like to swim much either. I’m not very good at swimming and especially not after 4 Sparks. So we got a ride from his friends. We climbed the fence and I decided that I wanted to play this game. So I took off a layer of clothing and got into the pool. I called him over to the edge and started coaxing. I climbed out, I danced, smiled, puppy eyed. It was really quite ridiculous. He never got into the pool. I was most definitely on the losing end of that game.
Of all the games I have played, they are mostly bullshit.
